Day 3 in Rome: Seeing the Pope -- Or How to Survive a Roman Catholic Rock Concert; A Dreamier Gelato; The Holy Stairs -- A Lesson on Indulgences.

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Day 3 Rome

The Papal Audience

One not-so-hot part about participating in a tour group is that we don't have any say in where we go or what we see. As we walk into St Peter's Square for the second day in a row, I am itching to break out and see something else of Rome. I was drooling on the bus this morning at the coliseum, the national museum, charming neighborhoods – and, of course, the trattorias.

The good part about being in a tour group is that it takes me to places I never would have seen otherwise.  So I am finding myself doing something I never would elect to do on my own – sitting in a chair in St. Peter’s Square at 9:30am waiting to see the Pope.

Forgive me, Catholic friends, but I don't get the Pope thing. We have Patriarchs in the Orthodox Church, but it's just not the same – I’ve never seen a scene like this before. The Square is filled in the center with rows of chairs for the Catholic faithful. A path through the crowd is carefully barricaded and secured by the Swiss Guard (the guys in the cool costumes below) – the Pope will soon be riding in his Popemobile along that path.

People are already cheering, like at a football game, but instead of spelling out a team name or something, a group of English speakers is spelling out "L-O-V-E" and "P-O-P-E."  Other people are singing devotional music. 

When the pope finally arrives in his Popemobile (it’s like a two-story golf-cart on steroids with bullet-proof glass), the crowd goes bananas. They are screaming and cheering and crying, crawling over each other to get close to him, climbing on chairs to get good photos (here is my photo).

It's like a rock concert. When the Pope finally reaches the stage (my mom declares that she too wants a Popemobile that can drive up steps), he begins his address in Italian.  Then each region of the Catholic world is recognized, and the Pope gives a special message in Italian, Portuguese, German, Spanish, French, and English. Talented man!  A German choir sings a beautiful tribute to him (at least it sounded beautiful – I have no idea what they were saying.) When he starts speaking in Spanish the crowd erupts with "Vive Le Papa!" Sitting next to us there is a group of dashing young men in suits and slick sunglasses using all their powerful youth to cheer at the top of their lungs.

I am impressed at the genuine reverence and love for Le Papa. I think of the Pope as a politician who runs a huge church that is also a powerful corporation (having worked for several spiritual organizations, I think all churches are also businesses, even if we don’t like to see it that way). The folks in the crowd, including my fellow pilgrims, seem to think of him as closer to God. I do understand the gratitude that one can feel for the man who oversees the spiritual path of so many. I can put myself in Catholic shoes and see the gift of that.

At the same time, as I will probably say many times in this blog, any way in which humans translate God into human rules and laws, we have the opportunity for confusion, corruption, etc. This is not a criticism - it's just the way it is. The opulence and power of the church sets off warning bells in me – not because the power exists, but because of what the human ego does with it.   As the battle between good vs. evil wages deep in the subconscious and unconscious, humans act it out in all kinds of ways – some of them wonderful, some of them destructive, and anything in between. 

I know many people who benefit deeply from the structure of the church; for them it is worth overlooking the dysfunction. We all get to make that decision for ourselves. For me – I just can’t buy it. I can’t put a figurehead or an organization onto a pedestal that has done so much damage, killed so many, raped so many, in the name of God. It would be outside of integrity for me to ignore that completely. I can have respect for the role the Pope plays in the world, but not reverence.

We escape to a pasta lunch afterwards. Because we didn’t know the details of our schedule ahead of time, we didn’t do any research on good places to eat.  We were so hungry, we just picked the closest place with tables.  It was a restaurant for tourists, clearly, with menus available in different languages.  As in the US, restaurants for tourists aren’t always the best and my salmon in marinara sauce over rigatoni is a bit of a disappointment.  Whatever – I was just hungry and happy to sit down to eat a meal.

I'll say this, it is also worth hanging out in Vatican City a second day just to find an incredible gelato place, recommended by another pilgrim. I enjoy coffee gelato and an amazing yogurt gelato that had a ribbon of blueberries throughout. It is the most sensuous creamy ice cream/gelato experience that I can recall in my memory.

I buy a crunchy, juicy apple from a produce stand, and we walk through the neighborhood to the north of the Vatican Museum as I crunch. It is so beautiful I am in my happy place just being there.

Eventually we leave the Vatican area for mass at St. Mary Major.  This cathedral has a chapel below the altar that reportedly houses part of the Holy Crib of baby Jesus.  We sing “Silent Night” gathered around the crib (which, by the way, is housed in a gold container – you don’t actually get to see much of the crib.) 

But we have more stops to make this afternoon, and we race along through Rome.

Church of the Cross  This is a significant Christian stop for the reliquaries it holds.  They have shards of wood from what was a cross used in the Romans’ crucifixion, and may have been Jesus’ cross.  There are two thorns from Jesus’ crown of thorns and a nail from the crucifixion.  I am not really impressed.  I don’t think they can absolutely verify that these items are from Jesus’ crucifixion, and we can’t even see them anyway – they are in golden containers.  We are just supposed to stand in front of the containers, say a prayer, and have faith that some magical energy is emanating from them.  I’m just not feeling it today.

Holy Stairs These are 28 stairs that Jesus reportedly climbed to his trial with Pontius Pilate, transported to Rome from Jerusalem.  You are supposed to climb the stairs on your knees, and then you receive an indulgence of nine years for every step - particularly since we are here during holy week, very close to the anniversary of Jesus’ walk up these stairs. 

At several moments I’ve heard our guide talk about indulgences.  Not being familiar with such things, I sort of get that these are things that we can do, spiritual hoops to jump through, if you will, that will help get us out of purgatory after we die.  (When I got home I checked out indulgences at this site - http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/07783a.htm.  Looks to me like “God for Lawyers.”)  There are a lot of things that I have to take on faith with this – 1) God is keeping score – oh, wait, sorry - 1) God is a father, a superhuman all powerful deity (read Zeus) who is keeping score, 2) Hell, satan, purgatory, and heaven exist as real physical places and 3) Only the Catholics have the corner on the hoops you jump through to avoid purgatory. Maybe there’s something I need to be paying attention to here, but for some reason the information falls out my ears.

So I do not ascend on my knees.  I have no movement or compulsion to; if I was called to do it, I would, regardless of indulgences. By this point, I need a break from the whirlwind, and so I take a calming walk around the neighborhood.  One thing I’m realizing about this trip – we won’t have much processing time, except on the bus, so I’m going to need to take every opportunity I can get for some quiet time. However, I hear other pilgrims report their experience – deeply moving, some wept as they ascended.  I think that’s beautiful.  I can feel how purifying it was for them to ascend those steps and I am grateful that they had that opportunity for that.  For me, it’s not just about the stairs, their history, or indulgences – it’s about how an experience impacts us and shifts us on the inside.

We don’t have time for people to process their intense experience at the Holy Stairs, because it’s time to race across the street to the next amazing holy site.

St. John of Laterano  This is another one of the major basilicas in Rome, and it’s just stunning.  What I like about this basilica is the flour to ceiling panels of white marble statues, like this one, lining the halls.  It’s impossible to capture the magnificence of this basilica in a photo, but here’s a little taste of the experience:

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Despite an overwhelming and packed day, I wasn’t tired enough to sleep during prayers on the bus.  I mumbled along a bit with the group, still new to the word differences from Greek Orthodox prayers.  I actually love prayer, but what I love most about it is the sincerity and love that wells up inside and compels me to pray – not a robotic habit of recitation. I also don’t feel it’s true that if I pray then that means I’m a good girl or I’ll get to heaven.  I don’t pray because it gets me somewhere – I pray because it is what is alive for me in this moment of relating to Oneness.

Sometimes it’s not what is alive for me. I look with adoration through the bus window at the beautiful flowers on the balconies of orange buildings, the ancient Roman ruins, the closed storefronts glowing in the setting sunlight, and the graffiti reminding me of the youth looking for a voice in this ancient city.  This is what’s alive for me right now; being in Italy. I feel more alive than I’ve felt in a long time. It seems to be inspired by the place, the art, the beauty, the noise and the graffiti – but that’s not just it.  It’s some process happening on the inside.  The awakening to art and culture that began in Chicago is plunging to new depths.  I can feel a vitality, earthiness, sensuality that is part of living awakeness flower inside. It’s awakening to a quality of life. My body feels different – it feels like something has been restored to it.  I couldn’t have known it at the time, but this was a part of the spiritual surrender and spaciousness I would begin to experience just a couple days later.

Coming Thursday: Day 4 - Four Towns in  Italy: The Abbey of Montecassino -- My New Spiritual Home; “My Daughter Is a Victim of Satan;” Catholic Cartoons; and An Angel’s Cave.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and insights! Post a comment here or email Sonya@illuminatedwisdom.com.